Thursday, April 26, 2007

Time to Relax

Yesterday I got the word that my one year of service to corporate America will end per the policy of the unnamed, largest software company in the world located in the Seattle area. I could get more specific, but then I am afraid of reprisals. We victims of corporate greed have to be careful of insulting our masters and thus receiving a quick stomp to the back of the neck. But, I have to say I am pleased with this dismissal. The corporate policy states I must now take 100 days off without pay, of course, and without any guarantee of a position when those 100 days end. Whatever. When the 100 days are over, I will crawl back and beg for another position. I am addicted to decent pay and, due to this ridiculous policy, my total indifference to the outcome of the work I do. I mean seriously, once I make it through six months or so and that fast approaching extermination date draws near, I pretty much coast. It’s kind of like being given a diagnosis of cancer with six months to live. Paying off that credit card starts to look like a foolish thing to do. So I am a victim and an abuser. I say all the right things, shift some spreadsheets around, do some dazzling things in the first few months and then play a shell game. Of course, the Company plays a game as well. They hold out the carrot of a permanent job opportunity for months and then, a few weeks before my termination date, when they think there is little to lose, they let me know that due to a reorganization they are actually letting some people go and that hiring me is impossible. It is a funny game, but little do they know that their promises to me are meaningless, that they are all part of the game, and that my objective is to only reach the full year and not leave any money on the table. Their projects, compliments, gifts and promises mean nothing to me. I am, metaphorically, a whore and their pleasure at my gyrations mean nothing. I just want to see those bills piled on the nightstand. Sure, I feel a little dirty afterwards but nothing that a bottle of wine and a good book won’t wash away.